How to write a car sale advert to scare people off

Added 23 May 2019 by

We’ve decided to write an anti-guide: we wrote down the worst things you can put in a car advert to be positive that no one will call to inquire about the offered car.

Use the vocabulary typical for car dealers

Car dealers are hardly ever trusted. Is it because they can prepare the car for sale in such a way as to remove all the “signs of crime”? Or is it because they know how to turn a pile of junk into every man’s dream? Or, finally, is it because they know all those tricks and and gimmicks which can fool many of us? Well, it is hard to say for sure. Surely, however, the black sheep in this business do a lot of damage to the reputation of honest car salesmen.

The fact is, we’d rather buy vehicles directly from the owner, or from a trader we know personally, who’ll go to Germany to bring us a car “just like the one for himself”.

Therefore, if you want to make finding a buyer difficult, put as many buzzwords used by car dealers into the ad as you can: all these “just like new”, “spick-and-span” and other terms that you wouldn’t think of.

Let yourself be caught lying

Next case: let the photo of the car show something different than its description. It’s great to constantly change your mind and keep casting a shadow of doubt on your credibility. What if the buyer accuses you of something and mentions something disturbing on the phone? Then lie as much as possible! Just stick to the lie; what can possibly go wrong.

Take an “erotic” photo of your car

No, don’t show the naked truth. A true, pure, sophisticated erotic photography hides more than it actually shows. It fuels the imagination. So take a picture which will force the potential buyer to guess the details. Let it be a shot taken from behind a bush, artistically blurred, focusing on some details and close-ups and omitting the “beauty defects”. After all, your goal is simple: to make a man come to you to see your car. And what happens next? You’ll think of something.


Other mistakes that will help you keep your car in the family

In addition to the essentials you’ve just read about, there are some more actions you can take to effectively deter potential buyers. Use these tricks, and your car will stay with you forever 🙂

  1. Overprice or underprice your car

The price will always attract attention if it’s too high or too low. More often than not, attracting attention is the only thing you can expect from it. If you want your ad to be nothing more than a curiosity, experiment with the price.

  1. Place your ad in the wrong category

This is not about clicking the wrong window but about ill-considered placement of, for example, a minivan in the “trucks” category. What are the chances that someone interested in a family car will find it there? Scarce.

  1. Impress them with the number of views

Endless extending of the same advertisement on a free car ad website makes the visit counter go crazy and show incredible results. For a buyer, it suggests that there must be something wrong with your car: thousands of people have seen your ad and yet your car is still available for sale.

Caution: smarter sellers can place a new offer for an old car from time to time, in order to hide the real number of viewers. So if you intend to buy a car, pay attention to the cars which appear on the portals again and again in new “incarnations”.

  1. Sell in the wrong season

Some cars are more popular in certain seasons. So you are selling a convertible in winter? Good luck! 🙂

  1. Place your ad in the wrong place

The location of the offer itself may also be inaccurate. This can mean both a web location (wrong page, wrong portal) and a real location (wrong car dealer).

Remember this, too: some cars can be more (or less) popular in certain parts of the country. A 4×4 car has a better chance of finding a new owner in a place where such vehicles are a natural component of the landscape.



A car ad is like a matrimonial ad. Both have the same goal: to attract attention, to captivate with something.

However, the similarities end there because even a moderately successful first date does not rule out the possibility of further meetings. A moderately successful car inspection usually ends with the potential buyer parting ways with the seller.

Yes, it’s good to prepare the vehicle for sale, but offers that allow the buyer to learn the advantages and disadvantages of the car are more reliable and therefore more attractive. In other words, the truth is more profitable.

And one more piece of (free) advice: if you want to sell your car, go where the potential customers are.

How to write a car sale advert to scare people off
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How to write a car sale advert to scare people off
We’ve decided to write an anti-guide: we wrote down the worst things you can put in a car advert to be positive that no one will call to inquire about the offered car.
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